As 2021 ends and we approach the new year, many of us are thinking about what we would like to do differently in the coming year. It may be a resolution to exercise more, eat healthier, be more assertive, or it may be an overall feeling of wanting to make a fresh start.
Unfortunately, a lot of the New Year resolve needed to make the resolutions reality, peter out in the first few months. Biscuits have crept back into the tin, the new exercise bike is now a wardrobe extension and you’re still saying yes to everything. This is life. There is certainly never any shame to failed New Year’s resolutions, but wouldn’t it be great if they could be achieved and maintained!
Are your resolutions realistic?
I used to give myself unrealistic targets to meet in the New Year and would never stick to them because they were too ambitious. When I was in my twenties, I signed up for an evening Tai Chi class. I dropped out after a few sessions because I realized that it would take years and years (not a 12 week course) to fully master the art. I wanted relaxation and mastery there and then! At the time I did not have the head space to devote more time to it (if I had continued I would have had over 20 years experience in it by now…).
Be kind to yourself
I sometimes feel that people use resolutions as a way to punish themselves for not doing enough during the last year, or for ‘being bad’ and eating too much/not exercising enough. Therefore, an overly ambitious resolution is made, ie: ‘This year I will run for 30 minutes, 4 times a week (outside) and have an avocado/kale smoothie 6 times a week and no chocolate.’ No, that’s never going to happen, (well it may if you read social media posts, but I bet it never happens in reality). And then the person who made this resolution fails almost immediately because running around the block, before/after work in the dark, throughout a British winter is No Fun! And that’s before we get on to the no chocolate part! So, the resolution fails and the person who made it feels like a failure and is resentful of the whole resolution/trying to do things better situation.
New Year is not a time to use harsh resolutions for reproachment or punishment of ourselves. We can ask ourselves, what, if anything, would we like to do differently in the coming year. We can examine what went well for us last year and not so well, and see if there’s room for change/improvement. And we can set ourselves realistic and achievable goals!
What could help me?
As a life coach I am bound to say life coaching! Coaching can help at any time of the year! The coaching process can help you make positive changes in your life. The process can help you to clarify issues and identify any obstacles that are holding you back. It can also help you to uncover your inner resources and strengths which will support you whilst you make life changes. Above all, coaching is a positive and motivating experience.
Whatever your New Year’s resolutions are or if you don’t know what they look like yet you are very welcome to contact me and we can work through it together.
