Do We Have Balance All Wrong in Today’s Virtual Work Environment?

Balance. When you hear this word, what picture comes to mind? Pre-COVID, here’s what it used to look like for me: piles of work projects at the office leading to stress when I got home. I can stop thinking about those work projects now that I am at home. Yes, I can. No, I have to focus on people and pets and projects at home. At home. Why am I thinking about that work project? I’m at home!

And that did not even cover this: I don’t have enough time for leisure and volunteering. So, how can I do that at the office? I’ll have to fit those in between the personal items I am not supposed to be doing here at the office. When I get home tonight, I have to do this because I fell asleep after my workout. When should I set my alarm for tomorrow?

For me, the balance work picture was the stressful part in and of itself. I pictured myself standing in the middle of a teeterboard and getting scolded by the school playground monitor. But either end is empty, and I have to balance mid-air, teeter-tottering with wobbly knees, never getting a firm foothold unless one side is grounded. If that happens, I lose. Trying to find balance that way is impossible. When you do find balance, how long does it take before you are out of balance again?

Oh, and how many calendars do I have to keep anyway? Yes, there are apps for that. Thank you.

I recall a conversation in which someone generations older than me couldn’t believe that I moved to a specific location and then I went looking for a job. They were used to moving for the job. Well, in our new, primarily virtual world, can we live first and then work? It’s all a bit cloudy, still, I think. So, to sort it all out, I think I’ll take a staycation to take time off work to get my yard work done.   

I think you are getting the picture. We say we need to have balance, but do we really? Yes, we can categorize our lives into home, family, friends, work, leisure, spiritual, emotional well-being, health, etc. But that gives us an excuse to focus on none of them because there are so many!

Academics call this work-life balance. I think we have it all wrong. Let’s try this word picture: blending.

Now, I am not saying having a vacation where we unplug from work communication is not the right thing to do at times, but I am saying that there really aren’t categories or solid lines. And now, it’s near impossible to separate things when we are doing much of our work virtually from our homes.    

We don’t have apps compartmentalized into spiritual, personal, political, arts, leisure, professional, educational, and volunteering, do we? How can we truly be authentic, transparent, humble, and coachable, like the leadership gurus teach us to be? Blending. 

Entrepreneurs, especially family business owners, are the best examples of blending. When they ask “How can I help you?” they actually listen to their clients and give them sincere ideas. Giving rather than expecting to take. It’s the opposite of asking “How are You?” so we get the white lie response of “Good! How are you?” and have our turn to talk. We can finally forget that our personal brand has the word “personal” in it. Balance prepares us to lie. Blending allows us to be honest and do the work because our passion for the work drives us to enthusiastic gratitude.

We make our mortgage payments, pay for groceries, tithe to church and charity, and receive our wages from the same account. Blending. 

If you are prioritizing during your deep tissue massage or having thoughts of planning your vacation during the weekly department meeting, then blending is for you. We are not out-of-balance professionals: we are taking our daughters to work. Blending allows us to be saved from the constant output of energy into maintaining the walls between our compartments. It allows supervisors, who have been supervisors for an average of ten years already, to attend training in how to successfully lead. No energy into unlearning unsuccessful habits. Blending allows us to realize it is a benefit, not a weakness, to ask for help.

Yes, blending blurs the boundaries of personal and professional relationships. But is our problem today that we are too connected, or is it that we aren’t connected enough? 

I suggest we move forward with less stress knowing that our to-do list at the office can stay at the office, but we are whole human beings after all. Fan and family photos are still at the office. It’s blending. 

Ryan Kauth is a business coach and executive who founded the current entrepreneurship program at the University of Wisconsin Green Bay. Over the past 25 years, he has helped hundreds of entrepreneurs grow their businesses. Ryan holds several business degrees and certifications, and has taught undergraduate and graduate business students and entrepreneurs. For more information visit https://www.RyanKauth.coach