The Weight of the Soul: A Journey with Mark Gomes Through The Heavy Butterfly

For Mark Gomes, the search for the soul has been a lifelong journey, shaped by his early experiences with faith, his struggle with doubt, and his eventual return to spirituality. Raised in a devout Catholic household, Gomes’ early years were steeped in religious teachings. Yet, as he grew older, he found himself questioning the very beliefs that had once provided him with a sense of certainty. The resulting loss of faith left him adrift, searching for meaning in a world that suddenly seemed devoid of it. But it was this very search that eventually led him back to the idea of the soul—a concept he now explores in his debut novel, The Heavy Butterfly.

The Heavy Butterfly is more than just a work of fiction; it is a reflection of Gomes’ inner journey and an invitation for readers to embark on their own explorations of life’s most profound questions. At its heart, the novel grapples with the existence of the soul, the purpose of life, and what happens after we die. It is a story that flutters between the realms of science, spirituality, and philosophy, offering insights into what our existence might mean and how a soul might exist in us, in this world, and somewhere beyond.

“I don’t like the idea of death being the end,” Gomes confesses. “Growing up Catholic, I was taught to believe in the afterlife, but as I got older, I struggled to hold onto that belief. I became more hopeful, wanting to believe in something more—something like the soul. But if the soul exists, then what happens to it after we die? Where does it go?” These questions became the impetus for Gomes to write The Heavy Butterfly. “I wanted to see if I could find a logical answer, not just for myself, but for anyone willing to ponder these difficult questions.”

The metaphor of the butterfly is central to Gomes’ exploration of the soul. Butterflies are often seen as symbols of transformation, representing the journey from one state of being to another. Gomes takes this metaphor further, introducing the concept of the “heavy butterfly”—a symbol for the soul’s journey beyond the physical realm. “People are beautiful and fragile, just like butterflies,” he explains. “But in the afterlife, we undergo a transformation. The soul becomes something more substantial, something heavy with the weight of our emotions and experiences. The ‘heavy butterfly’ is the soul that has taken on this new form.”

For Gomes, writing The Heavy Butterfly was a therapeutic process, a way to confront his own fears and uncertainties about death and the afterlife. But it was also a way to stimulate broader conversations about these topics, which are often avoided in everyday life. “I hoped that the book would be interesting enough to make people think,” he says. “Not to give definitive answers, but to encourage open discussions. Death, grief, and the afterlife are subjects that impact our wellbeing on a deep level, yet we rarely talk about them.”

Gomes knows firsthand the emotional toll that grief can take. The novel is deeply influenced by his own experiences, particularly the loss of his father seven years ago. “Melancholy set in after he passed away, and that sense of loss never fully goes away,” he reflects. “Grief is a part of life, and it affects our wellbeing in ways we don’t always acknowledge. I wanted to write something that would provide comfort to those who are grieving, something that would help them feel less alone in their sorrow.”

The Heavy Butterfly also touches on themes of diversity and identity, topics that are particularly relevant in today’s society. The story’s protagonist, Amber, is a young girl who challenges traditional notions of gender and orientation. Through her journey, Gomes explores the complexities of identity and the labels we give ourselves, encouraging readers to embrace their true selves. “There are a lot of parents and children struggling with identity issues today,” Gomes notes. “I wanted to write a story that would resonate with them, that would help them see that they’re not alone in their struggles.”

“The book is about a father’s love for his daughter and his quest to understand her, even after she’s gone,” he explains. “If my book can give people some thoughts in this direction, if it can help them navigate the complexities of love, loss, and identity, then that would be wonderful.”

Gomes doesn’t see The Heavy Butterfly as the end of his journey as a writer. He is already contemplating a sequel, as well as other projects that explore philosophical themes. “I’m fascinated by the intersection of philosophy and modern technology, particularly AI,” he says. “There’s a lot of excitement around AI right now, but I think we need to approach it thoughtfully, from a philosophical perspective. I’m interested in exploring these ideas in my future work.”

Ultimately, The Heavy Butterfly is a book for anyone who is grappling with the big questions of life—the meaning of existence, the nature of the soul, and what happens after we die. It is a book that offers comfort in times of grief, encourages self-reflection, and fosters open discussions about topics that are often shrouded in silence.

As The Heavy Butterfly takes flight, Mark Gomes hopes it will find its way into the hands of readers who, like him, are searching for answers. “If my book can help even one person to feel more at peace with these existential questions,” he says, “then it will have served its purpose.

The Heavy Butterfly is available in paperback and ebook formats at all good bookshops and online booksellers. For those interested in metaphysical fiction like The Alchemist or The Five People You Meet in Heaven, Gomes’ debut offers a compelling and thought-provoking read.