How to de-stress
At 16 years old, Matthew Ahmet left behind the life of a normal teenager to wash his clothes in a bucket and sleep on a plank of wood in Zhengzhou, China.
Now over 10 years later, he’s achieved his dream; performing Shaolin Kung Fu on stage as a monk from the Shaolin Temple and running the Shaolin Temple Cheshunt, in the UK. He shares his wisdom with us to help de-stress in 2016.
How to de-stress this year
Take a minute each day to be grateful.
Material things really don’t matter as much as people think they do. People also believe their lives to be much harder than they are. We have running water, we have hot water, we have regular showers and it’s these things that we take for granted until we see a different kind of life, like I did in China. Christmas may have put a lot of pressure on you and your family but taking a minute each morning and/or evening or even every time you feel stressed can help you to put things into perspective and be grateful for the things – and more importantly, people – we have in our lives.
Focus on your passions, not possessions
The lifestyle for the monks is extremely simple and they’re extremely happy. I feel that’s missing from Western society. People might have money, iPhones, a car, but what they don’t have is happiness. It’s a real goal in life, to find what you’re passionate about. Don’t let this material time of the year distract you from what’s important in life.
Be grateful
We only have one life and it’s inevitable that we die. In Shaolin philosophy, no one fears death. There’s no way out of it, so you’ve got to make the most of every single second of every single day that you have. Teach your children to be grateful for the things they have.
Stopping will help you go further
Rather than stand still, people like to keep moving, but what happens is they drain themselves out. You can actually get further by stopping sometimes. It’s like going on a long road trip. You say, ‘No, I’m not going to stop my car. I’m going to keep going, then stop when the fuel dies out’. But if you stop every so often at a service station, you get that break and then keep going. Meditation is a way for me to recharge my batteries without panicking. So many people live in a fast-paced world and think they’re achieving their goals, but they end up getting stressed and overworked, then they get sick more often. Kung fu really gave me a different outlook on living.
When things get too much – stop and ask for help when you need it. People can be very generous.
Meditate every day
Like with everything, meditation has become a big fad at the moment, but people expect to go to a meditation class and find peace, whereas in actuality, meditation isn’t like a class that you can take. It’s an emotional state you have to find and you have to practise every day. If you only meditate once a week, you’re not going to improve, you have to give yourself a lot of time to find that inner peace. Factor it in during the coming weeks.
Wake early and embrace the day
I wake up around 5am and it starts with training, going outside. It’s just a habit now, but it’s also my passion. I know what I want to do. It’s like children. Children very rarely sleep late, because as soon as the light comes into their room, they just want to get up, play Lego, or draw, because for them, life is glorious.
For a lot of adults, especially in Western society, it becomes a chore – five more minutes snooze and then another five minutes snooze. They’re energised at work, but then when they get home, they slouch on the couch and get into bad habits.
Use the extra time in the morning to do something you love so you can get on with the tasks of the day with grace.
Give 100% every day
Life is as simple as a choice. If you love to swim, then you need to swim every day. If a kid loves to play Lego, he has to play every day. If you love something, you have to commit to it. Whether you’re fascinated by space or music, you have to give 100% and when you give 100%, you will get 100% back – that’s how it works. It’s karma in the most obvious way. What you put in, you get out. Make sure you still factor in the things you love.
Responsibility gives you purpose
In 2007, I became a coach where I was teaching a class of students, and you’re living at these temples and you become a father figure. It’s such a wonderful experience, so I really wanted to have my own children. A lot of people I’ve grown up with and students of mine who are older than me are scared of having that responsibility.
I think having that responsibility gives you greater opportunity because you have this meaning, this ‘why’. It’s this automatic push to be the best person for your children, your family. It’s a very powerful motivator. I think a lot of people lack motivation in their personal life, because they don’t have any responsibility.
At work they do, but when they get home, there’s no meaning and all they want to do is engage in TV shows for countless hours or scroll on Facebook on their phone for hours on end, whereas just playing with a child sometimes is such a powerful, wonderful thing.
If you are looking at ways to help you de-stress Shaolin is available on DVD, Blu-ray and Digital Download.