Slow Down Like Kira

When did you last watch someone you love slow down and trust that it was the right thing to do?

Kira turns fifteen this month (this is dog age, which in human age would be a grand 105!)

In the last six months, her rhythm has changed. She sleeps a great deal now, living in a little world of her own where most sounds arrive muffled, softened, as if someone had gently turned the volume down just for her. And she knows exactly what she needs.

She sleeps when she needs to. No justification or apology. She hangs around the kitchen at “din-dins” time, punctual as ever.

She follows the sunny patches falling through the windows as they move through the house. On a hot day, she finds the spot where the breeze gently strokes her coat and settles in precisely the right place for her nap.

In the evening, without fail, she is waiting at the door for her walkie. Even in the dark, nose down, sniffing, tracking, fully focused. I like to imagine little fireworks going off in her head for every scent she catches. Then her legendary zoomies when we come home. Forgetting for one joyful moment that her legs are not quite keeping up with her heart. Her heart, it seems, hasn’t noticed she is fifteen, and her spirit remains young and full of life.

During the day, she still seeks our presence but not proximity. Knowing we are in the house is enough. She picks her spot and takes her own distance, quietly. Subtly, teaching us not to expect her at our heels every moment. Easing us gently for what will inevitably come next.

She knows what she wants and will not be negotiating it. If we are out and about and sit to enjoy the view or linger with a cuppa, she makes it clear that this is not the plan. Walking. Car. Home. And that is it! Sitting around in a café doesn’t work anymore.

She still stretches every morning, looks for playful moments, in smaller portions, keeping her own little rendezvous with the things that matter most: 

Movement. Rest. Sleep. Food. Sun. Air. Focus. Smells.

We know this is her last chapter. We don’t know how long it will last. It is so precious. Delicate and gentle in a way that is hard to put into words. So, we find ourselves wrapping our world around hers a little more, allowing her the space she is asking for. Letting her set the pace and the distance with acceptance. Living fully in the now.

My invitation to you this month is to …

 Borrow a pinch of Kira’s wisdom:

✔️ Take a nap, walk or rest without needing to justify it

✔️ Follow a scent, sound, or patch of sun, just because you can

✔️Notice one thing your body is quietly asking for, and give it

✔️ Let a relationship in your life be about presence, not proximity

I can’t watch Kira slow down, choosing what truly nourishes her, without thinking of my own changing tempos. Any woman moving through peri/menopause knows this ‘dance’ too. Menopause is not a last chapter, far from it! It is a new rhythm. The old pace is jarring. The body starts asking for more rest, less stress, more sun, less sugar or alcohol, more stillness, fewer obligations squeezed into an already full day. Some days the wisest thing we can do is exactly what Kira does without a flicker of guilt: rest when tired, eat when hungry, follow the light a little longer and stop apologising for needing what we need.

Kira’s last chapter is unfolding one sunny patch and one scent-filled walk at a time, and we get to witness it gently and learn. There is a wisdom in her that no book could teach. Acceptance, presence and the dignity of taking up exactly the space you need, no more, no less.

This month, may you find your own sunny patch, your own rhythm, give yourself permission to change your pace without needing to explain or justify, and dare to be the change you want to see in your organisation, family, community, and life!

Mathilde Barbier

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If you are navigating menopause, the always-on culture of screens and notifications can make an already heightened nervous system feel even more stretched.

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