Women: Watch Out for These Divorce Minefields 

Divorce isn’t just a legal process. It’s a financial reckoning, a psychological minefield, and a full soul reset. Instead of letting divorce become your undoing, it’s possible to find your voice, make grounded decisions, take back your finances, and rebuild your confidence. 

Still, when your soul is exhausted, sometimes all you want is to slam the door, deadbolt it 50 times, and never look back. But here’s the hard truth: you can’t just walk away from a marriage — you have to unravel it. You’re not just dividing up a house and some investments — you’re dividing up a life you’d built together. And in you doing so, what you agree to, what you fight for, what you let go of will shape your future more than you can possibly imagine.

It’s nearly impossible to become an expert in every aspect of divorce. However, throughout the process, you’ll need to watch out for these minefields.

1. Going in without a post-divorce plan. It’s critical to understand your financial obligations and how much money is needed to sustain your lifestyle as well as pursue the future you’ve wished for. Oftentimes, a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) will become indispensable for modeling different versions of a proposed settlement. Such experts can stand between you and an irreversible financial misstep.

2. Not understanding what’s really in the marital estate. This constitutes different categories, or “asset classes,” on the overall balance sheet that is to be divided. The marital estate is made up of cash, non-retirement investment accounts, business interests, retirement plans, real estate, and personal property. If it’s hard to measure the worth of any item or category on the marital estate, make sure to bring in a credentialed valuation expert — including one with experience testifying in court.

3. Ignoring tax consequences. Different types of assets come with different tax consequences. Don’t just look at the face value of the assets you’re “trading.” For example, a $500,000 brokerage account and a $500,000 IRA may look the same on paper, but what you actually get to use can be very different. Tax planning is one of the most important ways to protect your financial future. 

4. Fighting to keep the house without understanding the cost. One client I worked with hired a bulldog attorney and spent tens of thousands in legal fees in her fight to keep her house. She got the house, but she also got the mortgage, the maintenance, and a hefty property tax bill. In the end, the house stopped feeling like a home and more like a dead weight. 

5. Operating without a real cash flow strategy. It’s necessary to know where your money is coming from, where it’s going, what happens if you have a high-spend month, what’s your buffer, and so on. Real financial planning helps with calculating your expenses and running projections.

6. Mistaking a 50-50 split for fairness. I worked with a client who was initially offered a clean 50-50 split of retirement and brokerage accounts. On paper it looked fair. But she needed immediate cash flow to cover her new living expenses. By adjusting the division — giving her more from taxable accounts and a smaller portion of tax-deferred retirement accounts — she freed up the liquidity she needed without forcing early withdrawals or triggering extra taxes

7. Overlooking hidden or misclassified assets. During a divorce, money or property may be concealed on purpose or through omission. One client’s ex claimed his assets had underperformed for the last five years. But she’d seen the lifestyle — luxury cars, golf trips. With the help of a forensic specialist who investigates complex, she uncovered assets that hadn’t been disclosed. 

8. Failing to weigh legal costs against outcomes. Bringing in the right experts can save time, money, and sanity. But first determine who you actually need in making sure each person is helping move things forward. That means running an initial check or estimate before hiring a specialist to see if the potential benefit justifies the cost.

9. Choosing the wrong team — or trying to go it alone. Let me share an example: One client didn’t have the time or headspace to interview divorce attorneys, so she asked a neighbor she trusted for a recommendation. The neighbor suggested her sister’s divorce attorney: “Total shark. Got her everything.” Unfortunately, the shark ended up stirring the pot more than resolving problems. Once she realized he wasn’t the right fit, she’d lost time, money, and leverage. When looking for a good divorce attorney, find someone who’s specialized in family law for at least a decade, is strategic rather than theatrical, and respects your questions as well as ensures you understand the answers.

10. Settling too fast, just to be “done.” A lot of women approach divorce thinking: “I just want this over with as quickly as possible. I want to sign, split, and move on.” Granted, the temptation to put the divorce behind you can be powerful, but if you rush through decisions, you may end up with a future that reflects those compromises. Try to measure every choice against the future you most want.

Don’t worry if you read this list and see one, two, or five that you’ve already made. Unless the ink is dried on your divorce papers, it’s never too late to fix one — or all — of these.

Think of aligning each decision through your divorce with your soul’s direction. In doing so, you’ll find that you’re so much more powerful than you ever imagined.

Written By By Beth Kraszewski, CFP, CDFA

Beth Kraszewski is a nationally recognized wealth advisor and Certified Divorce Financial Analyst®. She is the founder of Purposeful WealthAdvisors, where she works with women navigating complex, high-asset divorces and major financial transitions. Beth has earned numerous industry awards and national recognition for her work, including multiple appearances on Forbes’ Top Women Wealth Advisors Best-in-State list, honors from Working Mother Magazine, and the Raymond James Woman of Distinction Award. She is the author of Stronger Than You Know – Empowering Financial & Life Decisions for Women Facing Divorce (Especially High Asset, High Stakes Divorce). Learn more at www.BethKraszewski.com and www.PurposefulWealthAdvisors.com.

Investment advisory services offered through Keating Financial Advisory Services (KFAS), a Registered Investment Advisor. Services are provided pursuant to a written agreement and the firm’s Form ADV Part 2A.[CC1]  The content in this release and in the book is intended for general informational purposes and should not be construed as personalized financial or legal advice. Individual results and outcomes will vary.