Why you shouldn’t let self-belief hold you back

After working as cabin crew for 20 years, 45-year-old Wendy Allen from Surrey was put on furlough during the pandemic and decided she would try and make the most of the opportunity.

Having always had a deep desire to go back to university but hindered by self-belief, she had developed a newfound love for writing poetry during lockdown and decided to explore this avenue.

Looking for a course that would help her develop at her own pace and to see if it was something she wanted to pursue, Wendy also wanted to workshop with other people.

She began researching options and came across adult education provider City Lit, which had a wide range of courses at an affordable price. “It was the range of poets and the subjects they taught which excited me. Since my initial poetry course I have gone on to study in the Masterclass with Ella Frears.”

After completing her course, Wendy went on to study for an MA in Creative Writing at Oxford Brookes University; something she is just finishing. Her first pamphlet was published in 2021 and she has a full pamphlet, Plastic Tubed Little Bird, coming out in May 2023, and a collection, free bleeding, co-authored with Dr Charley Barnes in 2024, both with publisher Broken Sleep.

She is currently curating an anthology of erotic poetry with Dr Charley Barnes for Victorina Press and the duo have a podcast, which launched in June.

“My immediate plans include submitting the collection I’ve written for my MA to a publisher, finalising plans to set up a literary journal with Charley and putting together my PhD proposal. In September I’m reading my first set in real life at a reading alongside my course teacher, the poet Julie Irigaray. I’ll be so proud to read alongside the person who has helped me achieve all of this.

“Before I started studying, I’d thought about everything I couldn’t do when I left my job. I couldn’t use a computer and, although it sounds silly, imagined I would never be able to. It’s very easy to concentrate on what you can’t do.

“I loved my job as cabin crew and never considered what I wanted to do other than fly. I felt exposed when I left, and worried that I wouldn’t be able to do anything else. Now I think of clichéd phrases like, it is never too late. Starting the course gave me a confidence that I haven’t felt before.

“City Lit gave me the confidence to apply to university and I’ll never forget the feeling of receiving an offer to study at Oxford Brookes. I’m so excited about all the projects I’m involved in and, at 45, I feel like I finally know what I want to do.”

Wendy studied poetry online with City Lit in September 2020.